with me agreeing to teach my feltball bracelet class at MOPACA's FiberU event in July in Lebanon, MO this year. I admit, feltballs aren't the most exciting fiber project around and I have had my battles with them (ie. my
prior feltball injury). So last month when the event co-ordinator posted on the site to start talking up your classes to get some interest generated in them, and hence students to sign up for them, I thought, "how do I make feltballs fun?" It took me about a month to think of something. And yes, I was thinking hard. Then one day over a week ago it hit me. Wild, untamed feltballs! Just like the Peruvians gather wild alpacas for shearing, and the mohairs in Turkey, etc, I could go on a hunt for wild feltball herds to capture and tame for my feltball class! Yes, it was a little out there but after I thought about it for a day I started having alot of fun with it. Feltballs in their native habitat, coming in from the woods to a stream for a drink of water, putting them in a Have-A-Heart cage to bring home, have them getting loose in my house and running with the dust bunnies under the couch, etc. until finally making a bracelet with them. I have a quirky sense of humor. But this was fun. I posted this picture on the FiberU facebook page.
And the next day, this one.
On the third day, (mind you that no one had posted on the event page for days and days prior to this) I posted that I had just received a text from a fellow hunter that a small herd of feltballs were seen in central Missouri and that I was throwing supplies in a backpack and heading right over there. That was Friday and I was in reality going to my friend, Bonnie's, house to take a 4 day felting workshop with Martien van Zuilen from Australia. Two days were jewelry classes and she uses feltballs in her jewelry. I was tickled with my idea about feltballs, I admit. When I talked to Bonnie and my friends about the idea, they joined in on other adventures the feltballs could go on. It was quite infectious. That is the thing about creativity. For me, it just happens. Sometimes it doesn't. I can't say I'm going to go out to my workshop now and think up something creative. Or make a masterpiece tonight. Sometimes, I just go out there and sit. and sit. So when inspiration does finally hit--boy I am all over it! lol and I was about the Chronicles of the Wild Feltball!
Then Friday evening I received an email from the FiberU event co-ordinator saying she thought the feltball idea was "cute...
however, some on the FiberU facebook site wrote that they didn't think it was appropriate...."
She asked me to maybe write one more and stop. I was crushed! Well honestly, first I was mad. very mad. I couldn't believe it. Then the next day I felt like I had been shot down. in the heart. Just like BonJovi sings, "shot through the heart and you're to blame". I got depressed and didn't make much in class. I was there, but my heart wasn't in it. I put wool down on the table only to take it up again to try something else. I doubted my judgement and I doubted myself. It is a bad feeling when you doubt yourself and you think that others disregard your ideas. I kept hearing the words 'not appropriate' in my ear. I know we creative artists as a whole are a sensitive bunch. We wear our feelings on our sleeves. It takes bravery to put yourself out there in public opinion. I remember now why I don't do it very much. It is a great blow to the ego to be shot down. It takes a while to heal.
I wrote to the event co-ordinator and told her thank you for your kind words about my feltballs...'however....
I do not feel like FiberU is the event for me'. I withdrew myself, my class and my vendor booth from the event. She wrote back that it was actually only one person who didn't like it. and some other stuff but at this point, my heart is not in it. What if I teach the class and one person feels that they didn't like it? Will I be slapped again? I cannot handle that kind of scrutiny. I have enough problems in life without putting myself in a situation like that. So, maybe me and hubby will go on a trip that weekend. Maybe Memphis...........
Talk to you soon, Tammy
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Talk to you soon, Tammy